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July 16, 2006
Boomerangs: An Editorial Aside
Okay, one thing that bugs me more than a reporter starting a story with a cliche -- "If an alien were to come to earth and see XXXX ...." -- and that is a reporter limning a cliche that he/she could have used, and then -- po-mo ironist that they are -- continuing onward.Case in point, a story in today's N.Y. Times about the resurgence of the boomerang. Here is how it begins:
Though they delight in lampooning athletes for spouting cliches, many sportswriters are themselves guilty of relying on hackneyed phrases. One frequent fallback, which comes in handy when covering esoteric events, is to describe someone as "the Michael Jordan" of his or her sport. There is no easier way to make clear that a team handball player or street luger is considered a demigod in certain circles.You're cringing, I bet, as you're hoping that this isn't going where you think it's going. Well, it is, because here is the next paragraph:
The Jordan comparison is particularly apt in the case of Michael Girvin, a former world champion boomerang tosser who is known as Gel. Not only is he a legend of this obscure sport, but his nickname also doubles as a brand name. Just as aspiring shooting guards can play hoops in Air Jordan sneakers from Nike, aspiring boomerangers can practice their throw-and-catch routine with a Gel Boomerang made by Colorado Boomerangs.Oye. Writer Brendan Koerner has the nerve to ding sportswriters for the Jordan cliche, only to use it unironically himself. He is usually much better than this sort of thing, so what would have been a better opening? How about zapping all the ass-covering and getting straight into it:
Michael Girvin is a former world champion boomerang tosser who is known as Gel. Not only is he a legend of this obscure sport, but his nickname also doubles as a brand name. Just as aspiring shooting guards can play hoops in Air Jordan sneakers from Nike, aspiring boomerangers can practice their throw-and-catch routine with a Gel Boomerang made by Colorado Boomerangs.The advice holds in more circumstances than this, so I'll put it generally: When you feel trapped with a story intro and compelled to use a cliche as a way to mumble your way into the thing, try deleting all the mumbling and getting straight to it. Brevity and velocity are all-purpose textual pain-killers.
There, I feel better, so back to regular programming.
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Paul, bet you didn't think anyone reading your blog was a friend of Gel's.
I first met Mike at my first USBA event on a lazy sultry day in northern Maryland, about 15 years ago this week. My wife and I drove down from Ottawa with no idea of what to expect, and I figured I'd be set to compete with two of those Colorado boomerangs in my bag.
I met and befriended plenty of legends in the sport that weekend, including Gel, who lent me a couple of his jugglers. I managed to make three catches in a row, actually setting a Canadian record that day. Mike then juggled well into dusk, setting a new world record.
The real crime with that article is that Koerner failed to capture the nature of the camaraderie in the sport, not to mention any explanation of its actual appeal. I don't think he knew where to begin.
Paul, great advice. One technique that usually works for me is: write the article, then delete the first and last paragraphs. Works like a charm.